"Stop!"
That’s the advice I was given as a kid when I felt anxious. I remember a caring aunt telling me, “Chana, when you have anxious thoughts, just say "Stop.” I figured it couldn’t hurt to try. So I yelled, “Stop!” I wrote the word down. I even pleaded with my thoughts to stop.
But none of it worked. My anxious thoughts just kept coming, because they wanted my attention. So, instead of trying to push them away, I decided to listen and talk to my anxiety.
Here’s something to think about: Why do guard dogs bark? It’s not a riddle. The reason is simple—they’re trying to protect the people they love. If you’ve ever been near a guard dog, you know they’re loyal, alert, and always ready to protect—even if they sometimes bark at things that aren’t actually threats.
Believe it or not, anxiety acts in a similar way. It’s loyal to you and wants to keep you safe. Just like a guard dog that sometimes barks when there’s no real danger, anxiety can get confused too. But the good news is, just like you can train a dog to calm down, you can do the same with anxiety.
That said, if your anxiety feels overwhelming or out of control, it’s always a good idea to seek help from a professional. A therapist or counselor can help you develop tools and strategies to manage it. Remember, asking for support is a sign of strength, not weakness.
If you start thinking about anxiety as an overprotective pet, especially for kids and teens, it makes it easier to handle. Better yet, think of it as a little monster that’s all your own.
**Project Time!
** 1. **Create Your Anxiety Monster**
Grab some paper and a pen, and draw what your anxiety monster looks like. Parents can do this too! Make it as cute, weird, or funny as you want. Does it have big eyes, fur, horns, or maybe even wings? Your monster is yours to create.
2. **Picture Your Monster Looking Out for You**
Now imagine your anxiety monster sitting on your shoulder. It’s not giant or scary, just small and maybe even a little silly. Everyone’s anxiety monster looks different. You could even cut out your drawing and keep it nearby. This little creature is always on the lookout, trying to protect you. But, just like a guard dog, it doesn’t always know the difference between real danger and a delivery person.
3. **Calm, Don’t Fight the Monster**
When your anxiety monster gets worked up over something small, you might feel like yelling at it or pushing it away. But think of it like a nervous pet. Instead of being harsh, try comforting it. Teach your kids to say, “Thanks for trying to protect me, but we’re safe right now.” Maybe even imagine giving it a gentle pat or hug (unless it’s too spiky, of course).
**Why Visualization Helps**
Visualizing an anxiety monster on your shoulder might seem strange, especially to older kids, but it’s a powerful tool. When you picture yourself calming your monster, you take charge of your emotions instead of letting them control you. By giving your anxiety a form, you start a conversation with it. It’s like telling your mind, “I’m in control here.”
The great part is that anxiety can be trained, just like a guard dog. It doesn’t have to run your life. When your anxiety starts barking, remember—you’re the boss. You can calm it down, reassure it, and keep it from overreacting. If it doesn’t listen at first, that’s okay. Just keep training your anxiety, and over time, it will get better at staying calm when you need it to.
