Okay, full confession: I was a kid who totally freaked out over things that seemed super small to adults. You know, like the time I was convinced I was going to fail a test that hadn’t even happened yet. Fun, right? Anxiety can be a tough thing to understand, but trust me, it’s like an iceberg. What you see on the surface is nothing compared to what’s lurking underneath. And for kids? It can be even trickier because anxiety doesn’t always scream “Hey, I’m here!” sometimes it whispers… in a very confusing way.
So, let’s talk about the 8 Ways Anxiety Shows Up—because, yes, kids are full of surprises, and anxiety has a lot of ways to make an entrance.
1. Trouble Sleeping
Ever tried to go to sleep but your brain decides it’s party time? Kids with anxiety can have this experience, like their brain is a never-ending chatty Kathy. They’ll lie awake, staring at the ceiling, worrying about what might go wrong tomorrow, or wondering if their pillow is secretly plotting against them.
2. Anger
Okay, so your kid seems angry. But really? They’re just like that one friend who can’t find their keys and freaks out, even though they put them in the same place every time. It’s anxiety wearing a “grumpy” mask. They’re frustrated because the world around them feels like it’s out of their control, and their anger is their way of saying, “I got this… not really.”
3. Defiance or Control
“No!” That’s the word of the day. And it’s not just for toddlers, folks. When anxiety strikes, kids can turn into tiny dictators. Whether it’s over their bedtime snack or what color cup they want (seriously, they can lose it over a cup color), it’s not about the cup. It’s about trying to control what feels uncontrollable. It’s like a tiny rebellion, but with more snack demands.
4. Meltdowns (Out of Nowhere)
So your child’s been chill for days, and then… BAM. They’re having a meltdown over something so minor, it’s like they just broke the sound barrier of emotions. This is called “chandeliering” (I wish I came up with that one). Basically, it’s when all the little stress builds up and explodes over something totally random. One minute, they’re fine; the next, they’re flipping over a napkin. Classic.
5. Trouble Focusing
It’s not ADHD. It’s more like “I’m so in my head, I forgot what you just said” syndrome. Kids with anxiety can get so wrapped up in their thoughts that the world around them gets blurry. They might look at you like they’re hearing you from underwater, and they’re not ignoring you on purpose—really, they’re just stuck in thought, probably about a dragon trying to eat their homework.
6. Avoidance
If anxiety had a hobby, it would be avoiding stuff. Kids with anxiety might dodge anything that makes them nervous. Homework? Nope. A party? Not today, thank you. It’s like they’re playing a game of “Don’t Look, Don’t Touch,” but the game’s only making them more stressed. The more they avoid, the bigger the anxiety gets. It’s a bit of a trap, honestly.
7. Negativity
Your kid might sound like the world is falling apart every time something small goes wrong, and it’s not because they’re naturally negative. It’s just that anxiety has a way of making them feel like their cup is always half-empty, even when it’s not. It’s like their brain’s stuck in “worst-case scenario” mode.
8. Overplanning
You know that kid who overpacks for every sleepover, just in case? Well, anxiety’s the mastermind behind that. A child with anxiety will plan every little detail of an event (like, “What if someone has an allergy at the party and I don’t know what to do?!”), because it’s their way of feeling like they have control. You’ll end up with a child who planned a whole party agenda—complete with a backup party playlist.
So, next time your kid is having a meltdown over something that seems like no big deal, remember: anxiety is sneaky. It hides behind behavior that doesn’t always make sense. But by understanding it and knowing the many ways it can show up, we can help them tackle it one tiny step at a time. And hey, if they need a meltdown over a napkin once in a while? Let’s just roll with it.
