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This topic contains 5 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by Profile Photo Chavy 1 week ago.

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    Participant
    avacad0

    I have a question, how in the world am I supposed to love myself when I grew up constantly being criticized and with lots of emotional neglect? Is it even possible to attain a positive self image? I am working so hard to undo all the damage, but it is so difficult.

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    Participant
    Verified Pro
    Eli Weinstein

    I am so sorry to hear that you went through such tough times.

    It is a long and hard fight to reverse things that might have happened in our past. I do believe it is possible, but takes determination and get the right help and support needed.

    I truly wish you the best, don’t give up and keep fighting !

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    Participant
    avacad0
    Topic Author

    Thank you! I am doing everything in my power to change. It is just so hard that I need to nurture myself at my age, when I am raising my own family. I need to feel satisfied within and plus to constantly give my children positive love and validation. At times I feel completely depleted.

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    Participant
    Chavy

    Hi @avacad0,

    This is a really tough but good question. I didn’t go through the abuse you describe, but I’ll try to offer something.

    It is might mighty hard work. And I can imagine how depleted you are. You’re trying to take care of yourself and your kids. It’s exhausting!

    Maybe it could help to think of the Chazal “B’shvili Nivra Haolam.” Translated as the world was created for me. For You.

    No one in the world can do or accomplish what Hashem set out for you to do. You have incredible potential. I never met you, but I can tell that you’re strong, capable and hardworking! That’s something to feel good about and own.

    As far as your abuse goes, no one can take away your pain. And it takes an enormous amount of work to undoe it. But, that doesn’t take away from how special you are. Maybe you could try to separate the abuse you went through and your intrinsic worth?

    One last point that I find helpful is to think about how much Hashem loves and values us. Hashem loves and values you more than anyone can.

    I really hope this helps and validates you. I know that whatever I said is much easier said than done. (I feel hypocritical for suggesting what I don’t always do…!)

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    Participant
    avacad0
    Topic Author

    Thank you @chavy for your validation and support! I will keep in mind all your tips as I continue to trudge along my  personal journey. I am usually a positive and upbeat person by nature, but at times the going gets just too tough for me………..

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    Participant
    Chavy

    In response to avacad0's post #6537:

    Sure and no worries! You’re doing an amazing job 🙂 We can’t be upbeat all the time 😉

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